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I have been on Ashley Madison for over 5 years. I am a woman in my mid 40’s. I am married and have been so since the day I was born it seems. I have a child. I am attractive but age and having a child does change one’s body.  I have had some ‘work’ done which of course means I probably need too much attention.
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While being on Ashley Madison, I have slept with nearly a dozen men. Some just once, some more than once, 3 of them for 6 months or longer.
I am not ashamed over this. (Mostly I am not ashamed, of course I feel terrible sometimes. It fades) I do not speak with my friends about this. My therapist has no idea. It takes a lot of work.
I want to write down my thoughts about why I do it, what i like and dislike about the experience at Ashley Madison, and yes, I would like to go into some details. I will change a few to remain discrete, but I want this blog to be erotic and thoughtful.  I hope that there is someone who is interested. (I told you I like attention, right?).  I would love to give men tips, answer questions, and share things that I want to say but can’t say anywhere.
I will change enough to protect the innocent.  And by the way, more  about me. “he cheated first!”. With a younger woman. Who I knew.And she had been to our house.
I did not go into this lightly. My first meeting I canceled twice.  When we did meet, I took care of him in an empty parking lot. Quickly. I wanted to feel needed and powerful. I wanted to get out of there. I swore I would never do it again. I cried and wrote him all of this. 2 days later I changed my mind.
That’s all for now.
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